eulogizing myself

as too many people currently know, looking for work is an incredibly humiliating undertaking.  i require several internal pep-talks daily in order to sustain the motivation and optimism i need to send out yet another job application.

i have found that applying for jobs requires i distance myself from my self.  it’s like i’ve died and every cover letter i write is a eulogy to my self.  here lies sarah burghauser: devoted teacher, meticulous editor, intuitive writer, active listener, team player, earnest observer of deadlines.

in addition to my pep-talks, i must constantly remind myself of who i am, and do things that remind me of what it feels like to embody myself in a fuller way.

when am i my best self?  when do i like myself most?  what am i doing when i feel closest to who i want to be?:  i am teaching, i am reading, writing, making work, engaged in conversation, experiencing new ideas, visiting new places, collaborating, helping someone else work through something difficult… i am at school.

my next cover letters might be shorter, more stylized, more energetic.  MORE HONEST.  experimental cover letters.


About thedoubleequal

TheDoubleEqual is interested in Anais Nin, Smut and subtext, Queer literature, Intersections of oppression, Jewish communities, Memoir, Poetry, All art, Subways, and Violent spiritual awakenings. View all posts by thedoubleequal

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